Introvertedly Soothed

Introvertedly Soothed

Yes I am an introvert.

I know. Many of you will confuse me for an extrovert.

Let me just say that sometimes I become more alive when submerged into loud crowds; but most of the times quietness is therapeutic.

I do not mind cosy dinners at home all by myself and yes I haven’t watched a single episode of ‘Game of Thrones’.

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We will still show up for the party and enjoy just like the rest of the world; the difference is we will remember more the snapshots of the time we retreated to a calmer corner of the dance hall just to dive right into an inspirational book or a one-on-one chitchat with a friend.

And thereafter we will wish we were home alone in our pyjamas.

Plus we will be deeply hurt if you didn't invite us.

And no, we are not snobs.

Allow me to re-introduce myself.

I am a lover of life, I like funny stories; and occasionally I allow myself to burst out in laughter for no apparent reason.

Reading triggers my soul and thinking through things however miniature they seem is something I can’t avoid,

I love food but I still wish to retain these curves; I think I have gorgeous cheekbones.

Be warned that I ask a lot of questions but you don’t have to answer them all.

I love parties and sleepovers and frequently retrieve back to myself to revitalise and think some more,

And yes I hurt from the pains of this world and empathy does not allow me to switch off.

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For countless times I have beaten up myself for statements I  made in cliques months ago; because I think I should have done better.

And yes sometimes I fleece back to re-make the bed after him; because I think it’s not neat enough.

I pick what to wear tomorrow today because I can’t stand the early morning hustle.

“You are so many of you in here’, that’s what I whispered when I was invited to read a bible passage at a friend’s wedding sermonette. Just to mention that I had been rehearsing the chapter for close to three weeks.

I was nervously wobbly and at some point, I gasped for air.  

And this has been a phobia of mine for quite some time.

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It’s gotten better with time except for the heart-leaps every time I step up to speak_ I am still learning to calm it down.

I have had to constantly convince myself to speaking up because it doesn’t come naturally to me.

Truth is we all have something to say; just that some take longer to articulate it than others.

And while we fight, we must learn to care. Because we all are fighting greater battles that can only be fought first from our minds in a place of stillness.

Some have conquered; others still fight on_ because there is no giving up.

For why else would we be still here?

Mwende